I SAID YES
Finally! I know. I cannot believe it myself! After all this time I finally had one of the best nights since arriving here in March 2024. Nobody panic. A ring on my finger is not what I am referring to. Got you didn’t I. I did however say yes to something I would have never considered and this is what it taught me.
As if it wasn’t obvious from my previous posts, I am not exactly a social butterfly. My happy place is at home, with a good book or a solo movie night in bed. If I am not at home, I am probably at someone else’s doing the same thing. If not, I prefer beach days or walks or running (new hobby that one). In saying that, I do get random cravings of joining the outside world in a more social way, particularly when there is something to celebrate.
I achieved a longstanding career milestone. I was so proud of finally achieving that goal and wanted to celebrate it. But of course, still in the process of building a new social network, I had no one to really call up and ask to join me. Usually, I am against all things social media but this time it really came in handy. As I was doom scrolling I came across a Christmas party invite for a social running club I have been following on the gram. By the weekend, the itch to celebrate just wouldn’t die. After a lot mental gymnastics and low key threats from my house mate, I decided to say yes.
I said yes to go to an online open invitation Christmas party… by myself… not knowing a single soul there
That night I pulled out a dress, put on some heels and did my make-up and damn I looked fly even if I say so myself. I took a deep breath before opening the door and walked in with no expectation of what was about to happen next! “Just do on hour Darc. If you don’t like it, you can leave”, was all I kept repeating in my mind. With a smile on my face, a lemon lime bitters drink in my hand, I approached a group of girls and my night began with a simple “hi”.
Them: “So who are you here with?”
Me: “No one”
Them: “Oh. Who do you know here?”
Me: “No one”
Quite enjoyed the look of amazement on their faces and was pleasantly surprised that they praised me for being brave and taking a chance. It might have been the drinks they had though, I can’t be to sure, but they embraced me all the more! Felt a little old being amongst 20 something’s and not drinking didn’t help me blend in but I can say that that night was probably the best night I had since relocating 8 months earlier.
Would I do it again?… I mean I am not jumping at the next opportunity. However, I felt so free that night. Free from the limitations I placed on myself. How I defined what I am capable of doing completely changed. And just the act of doing something I would have never even considered has boosted my confidence. So, if you are looking for a sign to go for something, or do that thing, or try something new, then I hope that this is it!
All my love,
Darcy
