DELETED

To NOT be on any social media platform in this day and age almost seems unheard of. The Earth’s population is 8 billion, with 2 billion people on Instagram. That’s 28% of the world sharing pictures, reels, stories and short video’s with consistent direct messages, likes and comments. 28% might not seem like a lot but 2 billion active monthly users is entirely overwhelming.

A few weeks ago I was all but one of the users on that platform. Do I miss it? No. However, I was not expecting the revelations that came from my decision to officially delete my account.

Reason 1: Colossal waste of time

I had Instagram for a good 10 years. My posts were initially sporadic. With the ever expanding world and increased popularity, I too started increasing my engagement. With Instagram advancing and introducing new features like stories and reels, I noted the effects of increased frequency. Once in a while posts just weren’t giving me the dopamine hit I started needing. Stories however, gave quick access to disappearing images which meant people were sharing more public, and sometimes private, captured moments and highlights at an exponentially more frequent pace. Tiktok and reels just dominated Instagram.

I started realizing just how bad I was at putting the phone down and being present. Just scrolling on my phone mindlessly, completely unaware of time. I tracked my time on social media and honestly got the shock of my life when I saw that I was spending more than three hours a day just browsing my feed and stories. I would be so unproductive, not only at work but with things I personally wanted to do. This blog I even set aside for no reason because I was investing my time into absolute garbage.

I even tried deleting Instagram from my phone during the work week in an effort to try stop this toxic waste of time. Dismally failing at that. Self-control who is she? I clearly don’t know her at this point.

Reason 2: Habitual toxicity

So not only was I wasting my time, I was wasting my time habitually. Instagram was the first thing I opened every morning, and the thing that put me to sleep some time in the a.m.’s. I’m sorry but any addiction is toxic. Instagram was becoming mine.

The fact that you have to convince yourself that you aren’t doing anything wrong is already a sign that you are in fact in some deep ish.

Reason 3: “Comparison is the thief of joy” – Theodore Roosevelt

I don’t care what you have to say on this one. I followed friends and people and pages that inspired me. Inspirational quotes, bible versus, phycological facts and advice, I was there. Barely followed any celebrates or influencers. Even with that in place, I found myself still comparing myself to people online knowing damn well that what was being posted was a highlight reel and not real-life. I was not out there living my “best life” with endless amount of money flowing into my account. I don’t have a husband or a love-life that looks like the Harry and Megan’s (I’ll save my unpopular opinions on that). My body has all the cellulite, lumps, bumps and rolls even though I go to gym regularly. Perfection does not exist. Period.

My humble opinion is that platforms like this have been designed to penetrate your sub-conscious. You know that what you are seeing is not necessarily real, and yet I challenge you to really be honest with yourself and see how much you have been influenced.

Reason 4: Need for Validation

My insecurities go back to way before Instagram was even a thing. Being accepted is a natural part of human development with our core being that we are social in nature. High-school was real for all of us and there is no way I was the only one experiencing rough times. Instagram exasperated an existing personal flaw in me. I was not posting for me. I never was. Every post went through a thought process of “is the lighting good enough?”, “does my hair look good?”, “is my make-up on fleek?” (I don’t know if that’s still the lingo these youngers use lol), “does my butt look big?”, “does my tummy look flat?”. This entire process is narcissistic.

It is completely wild to me that we have convinced ourselves that what we post on these platforms are for us and no one else, when posting in and of itself is for others to see, perpetuating the cycle of validation and narcissism.

Reason 5: False Connection

There is nothing social and about “social” networks.

How is it that there are 2 billion people to connect with on Instagram, yet loneliness is increasing worldwide? Another post for another day on that one…

Human connection has, is and will always be an integral part of who we are. I had a false notion that interaction on Instagram meant creating and sustaining connection with people. I would get likes and comments on my posts from so many people and yet my friends were never more than 5. By no means am I a social butterfly, and I love being home and away from crowds. But there was something about Instagram that afforded me connection without the need to contact. Just like texting is not comparable to in-person dialog, followers aren’t friends.

Since I have been off Instagram, an adjustment I am now fully conscious of is being intentional with connection. I initially struggled with loneliness, and in those moments I had to resist the urge to go back to Instagram, not only for validation, but also for that “connection” I thought was there.

All that being said, I don’t think Instagram is all bad. So many people have created a life-style for themselves using this platform. There is access to literally 2 billion people, and can be used effectively and positively I guess (not entirely convinced but I’m trying to keep the faith here). However, for me the bad outweighs the good. I cannot tell you what to do, nor am I going to tell you to delete your Instagram and other social networks. We are all on our own journeys in life and this just happens to be my latest experience. I feel the need to write this because I know for a fact that I am not the only one experiencing this weirdness going on in life.

Also, also…I will be back with regular posts now since I have more time on my hands ;). In the meantime, let me know your thoughts on this topic.

All my love,

Darcy